Worst Fighting Games of the 1990's part 2

Now turn your head and cough.
Read that ridiculous shit on the pic, just read it.

Killer Instinct 2

Rare/Nintendo

1996

Killer Instinct 1 was a surprise, a success and not to mention great alternative to the the blood soaked world of Mortal Kombat, and the cartoonish world of Street Fighter. We had looks, sounds, speed, and intensity all in one, complete package. We all felt KI's sting, and we needed to see it happen again, we begged the folks and Nintendo and Rare to give us a sequel, we clamored for it. If we had known that they were going to screw it up this badly, we would have probably kept our mouth shut.

KI2 was in arcades in the coolest looking arcade cabinet, with our good busty friend Orchid on the side of it, staring us down with those huge... eyes. The game featured updated graphics, and sound that really WASN'T changed but that was ok, the sound was fine to begin with. Everything looked great on the outside, but KI2 was like a chick with a Wonderbra on, and lots of make-up, and you find out after that hot date when you've taken her home that she's on the rag, (but still didn't bother telling you about that).

The characters are my first gripe. Cinder was awesome in the first game, c'mon! The Human Torch in a fighting game, what wasn't to like? Riptor wasn't a bad idea either, a human and dinosaur mixed, why not? But in KI2 they scrapped those and gave us the addition of new fighters that are as boring as they are forgettable. The worst part is they kept most of the other lame-wads too, like Combo, Saberwolf and Spinal and just kicked them up a notch by updating their look. The new graphics gave Orchid a much better bounce in her step which is fine, but she also had to now compete against other sex-appealed whores, like Kim Wu, and Maya. Conan the Barbarian must be really pissed he wasn't picked for the role of Tusk. Tj Combo doesn't look like a boxer anymore, now he just looks like an ass in camo pants. Saberwolf has bionic arms, ...Whatever. Nothing great to see here folks, move along.

But what takes the cake and hurls it, then eats it again, is the fighting system. Before, combos were as easy as start and follow with other buttons, and mix it up. Now here, we get a clunky and complicated system of "Auto" and "Manual" moves that don't perform nearly as satisfying as before. Now you have to have an 'opener', hit certain buttons in sequence and then close it so that the CPU opponent doesn't lay waste to your sorry ass with an even longer combo than yours. If you loved KI 1 and was able to bust out 13 hit 'Killer' combos than playing this game will totally insult your whatever previous skills you might have had.

The story to KI2 is worse than the one before. Now the game seems to take place 2000 years in the past. The logic behind that, is that when Orchid defeated Eyedol (yay! go Orchid!), Eyedol's death released energies so strong that it caused a time warp. Yes that's right, the ultimate excuse for having a trip in time, a WARP. I guess as a result of this warp, all the fighters now control and fight like ass, just like people from long ago. They adapted you see.

Not even Orchids skimpier outfit could save this game, or Maya's annoyingly bouncing chest. I like boobs, but jezz when it comes to a video game I'm %100 sure they're fake.

To top all this off, this game is easy, too damn easy. Gargos is the final boss (he's just a gargoyle) and if he was any easier he'd just stand there and beg to be hit for some kind of sexual kick. I should never have to up the difficulty ante on an arcade game. I guess after KI1 a lot of people bitched about how tough Eyedol was (he was too), but really that's the whole point of the game, and since its in an arcade, there is no reason it shouldn't munch at a roll of quarters.

I was mad back in 1996 and I'm still mad about this disappointment. I can only guess that the people at Nintendo and Rare didn't want the series to last, so they roasted this turkey. This game also had to compete against others like, Tekken and Soul Caliber so it was doomed from the beginning. If you also get beaten out by the Street Fighter Alpha games, then that's saying something, its saying that it was better the first time around.

Nintendo 64 FINALLY had a KI release entiltled KI Gold. Due to the N64's cartridge media that meant poor sound (compared to CDs) and no movies for all the characters. The first KI didn't even make it to the N64, which is really the fault of the N64 not really being a completed project.

[In fact a good side note is that during the opening ads for KI one in arcades, theres a teaser showing the 'Ultra 64' logo and the announcer of KI telling us that this game was going to be made for homes in 1995 only on the Nintendo Ultra 64. If the Ultra 64 was made instead of the N64, things might have worked out for Nintendo and they wouldn't have gotten stomped so badly by Sony and its Playstation.]

When the X Box 360 was in the works KI3 was announced and recently the development for it was cancelled. Maybe that's for the best. I can only imagine what kind of shit they'd give birth to for the third time around.

Fighting games are a dying genre really, and perhaps if Killer Instinct was translatable into a first person shooter, it might stand a chance on the modern systems. As crazy as I may sound, KI the FPS might work, after all I'd love to put a bullet into Spinals cackling skull. And repeat.

90's fighting games top 5- Number 2- Nintendo steps up to the big boy plate

Dispite all of the SNES limitations, this game still rocked.

Could she stick those things up any higher?
Nothing quirky to say here. Just look.

Killer Instinct

1994 (95 for the Snes release)

Rare, Nintendo and Midway (arcade distributor)

Ever see a line at an arcade machine? Then you most likely didn't go to arcades in 1994 or your only 10 years old right now. The arcade is dead and gone but Nintendo along with Midway was a brutal force during its golden age. Now you walk into an arcade just to see 5 displays of Dance-Dance-what-the-fuck-EVER!

In 1994, Mortal Kombat was two-year-old news, MKII was turning into the same after some months and Street Fighter's inability to make a sequel and not just another damn remake kept plenty fighting game fans bored silly. MK3 was on the horizon and gamers needed something to hold them over, ANYTHING. Nintendo was listening and grouped up with MK distributor Midway and released a fast, furious, and arcade-friendly opus that speed hungry adrenaline junkies could not get from MK and Street Fighter 2.

Nintendo had -and still has- a knack for kiddy games (but still damn good games). Previously Nintendo had made Donkey Kong Country with Rare and with the help of well animated action and well polished graphics they produced a fun (but also overrated) side-scrolling platformer. DKC was fun but it was really for the little guys around the 10-13 age bracket. Nintendo's next game would aim for a more grown-up crowd, and why not? Nintendo was in its prime and was at the time working on a new game system that would need one HELL of a launch title.

KI was a total surprise; a fighting game with pre-rendered sprites and some beautiful 3d backgrounds that all screamed high art. The game looked as if it was all done in real time 3d graphics but that was merely an illusion of the Rare software genius within. This game also had sound and music that pounded on your ears as you played. The fighting style of KI was the best blend of MK's hard hitting brutality with SF2 combo driven skill. The characters looked either cool or in one case... damn sexy, each fighter having a uniqueness that set the group apart from SF2 and MK (with the exception of one ) The announcer's voice sounded like Darth Vader filled with steroids and the piece of spice made this game feel so... alive (for lack of a better word).

To fight and win in KI you needed fast hands and fingers. This game is very combo-based and relies on your ability to chain attacks together, so no more jumping around and kicking unless you plan to follow it with some specials and other hits. Doing this will set off chain reactions that will cause multiple knocks to your opponent. What made it fun was that your opponent- CPU AI or player 2- could do just the same and release a humiliating barrage on you. Not all hope is lost, you could perform a 'combo breaker' and escape with less damage and give your middle finger to what could have been a hollow defeat. At the final moment of a match the dead player would sway in pain and in MK tradition you could vanquish them with a 'Danger move' which was a KI fatality. Another good way to victory was dwindling the last sliver of the opponent's health with a 24 hit "Ultra Combo!" (hearing the announcer yell that out always gave me a chubby).

This all happens so quickly and its handled so well-no round 1 or 2-no stopping. If someones life bar is drained for the first time, they hit the ground and wake back up with a second and final red life bar, and the other player doesn't start from full. This gave the game its intensity that MK 1 and SF didn't have. What kind of fight STOPS when the player keels over for the first time? That's stupid, just get up and dust yourself off and kick his or her ass. This was a fighting game without the 'referee'.

The character line-up was a diverse and well designed lot. Each of them having their own background and story:

B. Orchid: (my personal fave) The bad-ass babe of the game, armed with 2 clubs that looked like mini Star Wars lightsabers. Also armed with a great rack and a killer ass. I have no shame and I'm a chronic pervert, oh well.

Spinal: A skeleton with a shield, sword, and an annoying laugh.

Fulgore: A robot built for hand to hand combat. Has wolverine-like wrist claws.

TJ Combo: The total rip off character of this game, and total racial stereotype of a Mike Tyson-esqe boxer. This guy manages to rip off SF2's Balrog and Mike all in one fell swoop.

Cinder: A man on fire, like the Human Torch from Fantastic 4. Cool idea, really.

Glacius: The yin to Cinder's yag. An alien/man made of ice and liquid. Not a pallete swap, however.

Chief Thunder: Native American armed with 2 tomahawks. Cool character beside being another damn stereotype. Hmm Maybe game makers in those days didn't know that Blacks and Indians aren't all boxers and rain dancers.

Jago: Ken and Ryu-esque karate man. Not much else to say.

Saberwolf: Werewolf that fights. Not done before so I'll give it a thumbs up.

Riptor: Human-dinosaur hybrid that fights. This was 1994 and the movie Jurassic Park helped us believe in using DNA to fuck with mother nature, so why not put dinosaur and human semen in a blender and see what pops up.

Eyedol (the boss): A two headed cyclops. One eye on each head. So he still has 2 eyes... but 2 heads with only one eye on each (am I clear?). He fights with a large club that looks like an antique lamp and has these odd looking goat legs (I guess you can't always have cool characters 'across the board').

The backgrounds each reflected the characters personality and tell us that these events take place in a dark and futuristic world. Orchid fights on top of a skyscraper and Cinder fights on top of a tower in the desert. Some levels presented us with 'pit' like finishes which enabled you to knock each other off of the tower at the end of a match, giving you a cool look at the soon to be dead fighter falling and hitting the pavement below. Riptor fights in a room littered with spikes and blood spilled all over, Glacius's world looks like Antarctica with an 'Asian temple' look. All in all, very imaginative.

The other plus brings us back to sound. Each level had a soundtrack of really good metal, techno, and hip hop music. The music and sound to KI was SO good that when it was released on the SNES the game came with a music CD in the box of all the songs. This game WON and conquered in the sound, graphics department.



But it wasn't all wine and roses.

KI's story was sooooooo... written after the game was complete.The plot to this game revolved around an evil company called 'Ultratech' that every year, holds a tournament to test out its products and even kill of few of its critics and traitors while at it. Riptor is a product of Ultratech as well as Fulgore. Orchid is a spy looking to dismatle the company by pretending she is a Secretary that just HAPPENS to carry two lightsticks that kill. Saberwolf is really just a man in a wolfs body looking to get a cure for his affliction of werewolf-ism. Eyedol is... fuck I guess something that Ultratech did for shits and giggles. The point, is the story wasn't the point.

Action was the point and it was there. This game took arcades hostage and created the aforementioned 'lines'. I played this game at arcades and eventually on its SNES release. I remember being beyond excited to get this game, and Nintendo broke a rule by putting the game into a black cartridge shell, so that made us ALL believe that KI was a hit not even Mortal Kombat got this much great marketing. In the pile of grey shells of games like Street Fighter 2 and MK 1 and 2, that black KI cart catches the eye.



However, this was also the game that showed the Super Nintendo it's age. The SNES version was still good, but it was SEVERELY cut back from its arcade counterpart. No full motion videos, tacked on endings, fewer frames of animation, and dumbed down sound. I expected all this and even at the age of 13 I was grateful that Nintendo TRIED to deliver a great translation. Even the Game Boy had a KI release, and boy did it suck, theres no need to cram 10 pounds of awesome in a 1 pound bag. At this point we now started to see what our precious Super Nintendo WASN'T capable of, and it was a revelation to Nintendo and the world that a new system needed to be made. The even bigger disappointment was that the N64 didn't have a KI release until later in that consoles life and was still lacking what the arcade had; No videos, weak sounds all because of the N64's cart media. We just couldn't win.

KI had a sequel and it came and went shortly after the success of the first game. It was nothing special. New characters that no one remembers and cool characters from the first game taken out for no reason. As of writing this article I read in my research that a third KI was in the works for the Xbox 360 but Rare has since cancelled it. That REALLY blows, a gaming system like the Xbox 360 could literally reinvent the KI series, full 3d real time graphics, surround sound in 5.1. I guess it just comes down to the fact that sometimes its best to leave well enough alone, or in this case just let it die. Wow... A great game started with a bang ends with a whimper. KI 2 was even beaten by the weak ass MK3 in terms of popularity. That makes this loss even more pathetic.

Killer Instinct was awesome and almost made it to #1 on this list. If this game wasn't so 'flash in the pan' it might have been higher. The industry can learn from this, if you make a sequel, you have to top yourself, not repeat. The success of KI was enough to get Nintendo to the front and really push the N64 system, but the surprise to me the writer is that this series never really blossmed to "Franchise" levels. No major merchandising, no cartoon on Saturday morning and no big budget movie (thank God Nintendo learned their lesson from the Mario Bros movie) .

Go to almost ANY emulator site and you'll find out that the arcade MAME version of KI is not so easy to find and even harder to put together and program, . I guess this was done on purpose , but it still sucks. I guess I need to win the lottery and buy the cabinet. For now I'll treasure the memory of how Orchid could kill off her enemy by opening her shirt and flashing her fun-bags at him.